Recently at Mass Father's homily referenced Ephesians 5. Marital theology for the newly formed Christian community is being presented and explained. Its goodness is its ability to take chaotic times and create a sense of direction and purpose. The new Christian community, in following the teachings of Christ, will "look" and "act" differently, in a more fuller way then that of the secular culture. Paul instructs women to be subject to their husbands and husbands to treat their wives as if they were their very lives. Divinely inspired and necessary for a time of extreme inequality of men, women, and children, a time when sexual pleasures ran rampant and resulting children possibly left to die in the elements, a time when women, after having worked hard as helpmate, were being discarded, abandoned and impoverished for someone younger and more sexually attractive. Christian marriage was an opportunity for Christ's mission of love to enter into the very fabric of society and elevate the people's value through equality, fidelity, and the love and nurturing of children within the family home.
On this particular Sunday the priest spoke to the women in the pews telling them of their need to be subject to their husbands and then joked that if their husband was not treating them as if they were as important as their husband's body, then they should remind them that "Father said..." I bowed my head at that point and in my heart told Father "You are being way too simple here. Many women are hit at this point." I sat for a moment longer and thought "Father, you are ignorant because there is no helpful theology of women within the Church to explain things to you. Us women need to let you and others know what the current depth of this Scripture passage is as a gift of God's grace to you, to us, and to the future children of the church." On the car ride home I turned to my two teenage girls in the back seat and I told them that Father should not have made "light" of such an important topic for our "age" and that they were not subordinate to anyone, except the will of God. God was calling them to be co-stewards with their brothers in Christ but not "subject" to their permissions, their education, their instruction. Times are more legally equal and the spiritual depth of the passages have not been fully dug without women weighing in on them theologically.
The time has come within our culture and the greater world for us to realize that we have grown philosophically, theologically, academically, physically, and spiritually for us to "wonder" and be "curious" about our female and male created identities and relationships. Scripture tells us that no one knows the spirit of the person except the person themselves through their relationship with the Holy Spirit of God. Women have been called by God and by Pope Francis to open up and share the depth of their spiritual knowledge. By doing this we can count on the promises of Christ and by His saints that "all will be well". We do not have to fear each other spiritually. Men and women were created by God to be mutually helpful to each other while tending His created world and the creatures therein.
Paul wrote what he was spiritually inspired to write. He did not know how this would be affecting humanity thousands of years later. He would not have known what the world would have been like as women continued to scratch out a more "equal" and complimentary existence. He would not have known how so many have been abused and shunned due to the misunderstandings of his words. He meant them to help create harmony and compassionate relationships. Many times this did occur but just as many times, or even more often, women were abused for their lack of "submission". They still are and until the Church has the language of the beaten woman placed within the homilies, until her cries of fairness and the love that Father spoke of do not preceed the sting of the slap or the punch in the stomach or the crunch of a broken jaw, we have not heard the depth of the Gospel. I imagine another type of sermon. A sermon where people leave uncomfortable for it is a difficult passage. A sermon that goes something like..."We still have inequality in our world, our country, our community, our parish community, and our domestic churches that harm girls and women. We have aged mothers being punched and pushed to the ground or left without even the slightest visitation or care from their children. We have middle aged women being ostracized for their size, their age, their looks, their lack of fashionable clothing. Many are being laid off from their jobs due to ageism and made to think they are invaluable, maybe even being made to think they are guilty of growing older despite their fidelity and steadfast care for their career and/or child raising or wifely committments. Young women are constantly being sexualized on the internet, in books, magazines, at the corner ale house, in the movies, at the local clothing stores, in the universities and high schools, etc. And young girls are being raised to accept their "role" instead of seek out through spiritual discernment their true authentic creation and the spiritual gifts and possible spiritual graces that the Holy Spirit has given to them. This is the reality. The Church and the world needs Christian "light" and we have to come out from under our bushel baskets and shine with the knowledge that women have been affirmed by God to be equal to their male brothers. We have to make our homes, our neighborhoods, our workplaces, our parishes, our culture, and our nation places where women can thrive and be allowed to learn what it means to be fully a daughter of Christ and be able to do this with their brothers assisting them. Go, look justly at your home life, at your work place, at the shops, the airports, the hotels, the movie theater and when we say at the end of Mass 'Go, and serve one another." you will know what it is that you have to do, you must do for those women in your lives that you love with the love of your own self. Then, come back and tell us what you have seen so that we may all grow in your knowledge. Share it at the council, share it at the various committee meetings, share it at the teacher meetings, in the dining halls, in the gathering place. Let no one be silent for you are the hands and feet of Him who died for you so that you can impact the Church and the world." That is part of a sermon I want my daughters, granddaughters, and great granddaughters to hear. How affirming. How uplifting. How transforming.
Does all of my writing lead to me stating that I want the equal opportunity to be a priest? NO. I do not have a calling to the priesthood. Nor do I have a calling to the religious life. I asked God and He gave me "dead air". Instead I have a calling to theology, to the study of Him and His revelation of Himself to mankind and I am expected to write with a prophetic voice that women are being called to let the Church and the world know their stories, to let the Church and the world know their relationship with Jesus Christ through their relationship with His Spirit that dwells within them. In this age of communication any woman can pull out her keyboard and type. Pick a blog, write a letter, call someone and begin the conversation. We have a voice and it needs to be heard. That voice is a gift of grace to the Church and the world as a merciful act from our merciful God. He is waiting to see how we will answer His calling. Will we speak with the authority of one who knows who she is? Will we be courageous and brave to look within ourselves and make time for a relationship with the Spirit, one we can clarify and share? Or will we be a part of another generation of women who raise our daughters, granddaughters, and great granddaughters to be victims to the human they submit themselves to and blame the Church because "Father said..."?
